He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
My vagina just clenched in fear
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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