i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
