Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
porn star boner night. come get it.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm at about main and main street
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
