There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
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