Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
