Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
handjob tips. give me some.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize