just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
