Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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