They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
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