she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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