hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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