she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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