but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
