Please, let me fuck your mom
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
we're making bets on your personal life
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
