There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
