You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
