Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
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