I wanna passion pit in your ass
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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