I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
