Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize