DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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