hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
She even gives head with a lisp.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
3pm strippers are depressing
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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