don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm bleeding and have questions
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
