so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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