If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
