is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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