I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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