I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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