Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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