did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
