I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Is it because I queefed?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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