Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
