I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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