If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
