Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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