No subtext here. People are naked.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize