is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
