My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
