At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Randomize
