I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
