..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
