do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
