i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
i believe in u and ur pee
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize