Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
