That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
