I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
