is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
