your room smells of hookers.
And success
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i think i have herpe
just one?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
