do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
