got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
