You just made me feel so damn special
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize