gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Randomize